Premier League Soccer Picks and Predictions for MatchWeek 29

Fuck daylight savings (yes, if you’re looking for a soccer intro, I'm sorry but just skip to the picks). This is, without a doubt, one of the dumbest inventions of all time. Every year, twice a year, we arbitrarily shift our clocks an hour to change when it’s light or dark, because apparently that's something everyone should have to do. I DEMAND CHANGE, DAMN IT!

And, to give myself some slack, this also sort of ties to soccer. Because the world can't even agree on WHEN to arbitrarily make that time change and Europe’s shift forward is inexplicably 3 weeks later than ours, making all of the soccer games later than normal. It is preposterous and I will shake my fist at the clouds as I demand change from politicians who are never going to bother listening to me. Oh, and we also lost all our bets last week (just to slip that in there) which was bad too. But mostly damn you time change!!!

 OK, let’s gamble.

MORE: Premier League Best Bets 

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Premier League Best Bets - Week 29

Fulham vs. Spurs: Saturday March 16, 1:30 PM EST

This week the DimersBOT is taking a temporary leave of absence and I’m going back to my old ways. If you haven't already, go check out the newly rolled out Dimers Prowhere you can see all of the models picks, but here you’ll only get mine.

As for this game, well, I’m probably going to do something stupid. Spurs 4-0 at Villa last time was the work of Super Buddha himself (think Buddha crossed with Super Man), and the one thing I know as a Spurs fan is that big wins are ALWAYS followed by disastrous performances. But, while I know that in my heart, my brain is telling me that Spurs TT Over 1.5 at -142 has value.

This side is scoring as well as almost anyone, but they are still defensively liable to give up a bad goal or two. Needing three points and knowing 1 goal will certainly not be enough, I expect my beloved Totteringhams to continue to rely on their offensive talent. -142 isnt exactly a bet that you see cappers give out a lot, but when the value is there it still makes sense. Fulham dont have the guns to keep up and their season is essentially over, having probably reached safety but with no chance of European spots. They'll fizzle out as the year ends.

⛏️ Sam’s Pick: Spurs TT Over 1.5 (-142) - 1.42U

⚽️ MORE: Fulham vs. Spurs match prediction

West Ham vs. Aston Villa: Sunday March 17, 10 AM EST

And, for our second act, we go to our friends at Villa (I can call them friends now) who I think have a bounce back week. That performance against Spurs was an abomination overall, but this team scores too well to be held down consistently and neither them nor West Ham play anything close to safe soccer.

The Hammers have conceded 49 goals in 28 matches, and shockingly sit in 7th place despite their negative GD. Villa also concede too much, but they make up for it with their 59 goals scored and I think they benefit more from the chaotic and open nature of this game, particularly with Ollie Watkins up front.

It wouldn't necessarily say that 2 goals is enough to get Villa the win here, but I do think they get 2 goals. A 3-2 West Ham win would be particularly enjoyable…

⛏️ Sam’s Pick: Villa TT Over 1.5 (-110) - 1.1U

⚽️ MORE: West Ham vs. Aston Villa match prediction

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