College Football Bets: What You Need To Know Before Week 8, 2023

What in the ever loving fuck, guys. After Week 6 I walked away from the CFB feeling like I sort of maybe somewhat had a grip on the college football landscape and what direction we were headed in. After Week 7, I’m back to knowing absolutely nothing. Bama and UGA struggled with the worst teams in the SEC, Louisville lost to Pittsburgh, Dan Lanning produced a coaching performance that made me question whether he had been paid by Washington to lose, and USC got (hilariously) curb stomped by Notre Dame.

And then we have the Big 10, which has done absolutely nothing for us through seven weeks aside from proving that there are three teams who matter and maybe it’s about time they played each other (hint: it’s happening soon).

Do we get answers this week to finally settle my confused and warped brain? I think so. You’ve certainly got a few games that will decide conference title matchups or even CFP hopes. But then again, its college football, so expecting answers is like showing up to a furry convention looking for advice on how to take care of your pet.

With that fun analogy, let’s do some gambling!

Before diving into Dimers' college football predictions or this week's best college football bets, you should know it definitely pays to have more than one funded US Sportsbook account when betting on sports.

For example, did you know that new users at bet365 can get $150 in bonus bets after betting just $5? That's easily one of the best promos to take advantage of when betting on football this season.

1. Time to End Some Dreams

For me, this week is more about death than glory. Sure, as previewed there is a pretty important game in the Big 10 that we may discuss in a bit, but aside from that there isn’t a ton of intrigue as far as top teams making a big step towards conference championships or the CFP. What there is, however, is a bunch of one loss teams barely treading water and some of them are about to drown (that may have been a bit dark).

The two most notable matchups from that perspective are Bama vs. Tennessee and Utah vs USC, all one loss teams whose season essentially ends with a loss. There are a few other teams with tough tests like Oregon (again, fuck them), Mizzou, and Iowa (because for some inexplicable reason the Big 10 is still doing divisions) who just cant afford to lose if they want to play meaningful games in November.

How does it shake out? Well, this isn't an article for predictions, but look for teams like the ones I listed to play with a bit more desperation.

2. Obligatory Heisman Rundown

The Heisman is, in my opinion, one of the dumbest spectacles in all of sports. Like the National Spelling Bee and the NFL draft, the Heisman is just a pile of garbage that garners attention for no reason other than Sports Media LOVES talking about it. That said, here I am talking about it so maybe I’m no better.

As for the award, well, Michael Penix Jr. has grabbed a massive lead because it’s a hopelessly flawed system that bastardizes high quality teams play into an a trophy for the QB or RB (whichever is better) of that team, unless the media doesn't like either option. Is Penix the best player in the country or an MVP of sorts? Absolutely not. He’s not even the best player at his position. But he’s gonna lead by default until someone else grabs it from him or Washington pisses down their leg.

Looking for a value option? Figure out which of Big 10 Big 3 (Trademark Pending) is going to survive and pick the appropriate QB/RB.

Our updated look at College Football Futures: Who will be crowned National Champion?

3. Two Must-Watch Games

Speaking of the Big 10, there are two football games that need to be on your screen this Saturday. The first, obviously, is Penn State at Ohio Sate which sets up to be a fucking bloodbath. And, even better, I dont think anyone has a clue about the outcome. Neither team has massively impressed or done anything all that terrible, and it’s going to be interesting to see just how these two stack up against top class competition. My opinion? Look for some points in both directions.

The other must watch (though with a considerable asterisk next to it) game is Duke at FSU. Admittedly the intrigue there gets lower depending on how healthy Riley Leonard is (Duke’s backup went 4/12 throwing against NC State), but we’re running low on losable games for the ‘Noles and this could be the toughest test they face for the rest of the season. If not just to set eyes on them playing a real football team, you’ll want to see how they handle a surprisingly good Duke squad.

Make sure you check for value in Dimers' College Football Player Prop Bets section before locking in any picks for your parlays.

Enjoy gambling responsibly. Treat it as entertainment, not a way to make money and only gamble with funds you can afford to lose. Know when to stop and seek support if needed. Remember, gambling should be a fun and enjoyable experience. If you or someone you know has a gambling problem, crisis counseling and referral services can be accessed by calling 1-800-GAMBLER.